should have just kept my mouth shut

yeah, what i wrote about in my last post – disregard that. its not as if i actually asked her out, but had i done so, it wouldn’t be of any use anyway, cos yet again…she’s seeing somebody. can’t blame her really, its just really frustrating.
yet again, i fall short, drawing no interest from anyone that i’d want to. its not the only thing that matters, but looks mean a lot. they play a large part in being attracted to someone – anyone who says different is lying to themselves. there has to be one kind of spark (whether its an ‘opposites attract’ kind of thing, or their sense of humour/being genuine, or you have a lot in common with them), which meshes with the physical attraction you have to another individual.
why is it though, that i can’t seem to cross that final hurdle, and find that confidence to let a girl know that i’m interested? why am i so sure that i’ll be rejected? i mean, nasty people exist, thats a certainty, but not everyone is bound to be a piece of shit.
i need something to keep my spirits up though – its exhausting trying to keep myself going…i need something to encourage me to keep going. i can’t do this by myself.

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